Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Something that looks a bit like a Frisbee will destroy us one day...


My dearest extreme web surfers,

I wasn’t going to write another blog until something absolutely spectacular happened to me like I got married or won a nobel prize. 

What changed I (do not) hear you ask? 

My life changed. 

This place is addictive as those RPG games like The Sims and Rollercoaster Tycoon. I was not expecting that. I was expecting to lose interest a day after my first blog when I realised that the shit I wrote was just floating around in a sea full of ones and zeros, not to be seen as anything but a muddled mess. My thoughts were a smudge of plankton in the middle of the ocean waiting to be pretty much inhaled by a passing sperm whale. If I was lucky it’d get stuck in his baleen.

While I was working today (Awesome work. I’m sure I’ll explain later), I had a quick look at my stats. I didn’t even realise I had stats. What greeted me was the COLD HARD FACT that four people had viewed my first ever post; people from Australia, Germany, Malaysia and America.  Or at least, they’d clicked on my link and had then been distracted or thought better of it. I dunno, like went out and ENJOYED THEIR LIVES.  I’ve never even been to Germany and someone was there reading my things. Things that I had typed into my computer with my very own fingers that I half hoped no one would read to save my embarrassment and half dreamed that someone like Jonathan Safran Foer had read it (eek) and asked me to be his protégé.  I am sounding like my mother. I digress.

What really got me was that my simple little thoughts were out in the universe now. My blog was like a tiny bit of space dust settled on a moon orbiting around a planet which is orbiting around a star which is part of the Andromeda Galaxy.  It’s what your peripherals have been observing for the past few minutes and it’s one of the most fucking beautiful things that I have ever seen. 

Andromeda is the closest spiral galaxy to our own- a mere 2.5 million light-years away. What of it, hey?  Bearing this in mind, it’s hurting towards us at a rate of 400 light-years every million years.  On a date around 4.5 billion years from now Andromeda will merge with the Milky Way, possibly destroying earth and most of what we know about our night sky. Not that the human race will still be plodding around on Earth by then but really, who couldn’t love something so powerful and foreboding?

I’m so sorry. I will stop with the tenuous analogies.

I feel like I am part of this beautiful entity now.  I’ve only recently started reading blogs and in the past few days I have laughed until my eyes watered and cried until I laughed at my own hopelessness. Now I have a blood nose. I should take that as a sign from the universe to shut the fuck up.

But hell, I love you bloggy people. Maybe not all of you, but enough to be overwhelmed by the mass of individuals that I have never met but feel like I could entrust my life to. This is what the twenty fuckin’ first century should be all about.

love
x


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